Day 446

This Crippling Cruel Cursed Common cold has completely flattened me.

Is it a co-incidence that it has come near the end of this lovely 2 and a half week holiday? Or is it most natural at this time when I feel a deep resistance to leaving home? I am now leaving one home for another, writing this blog on the plane while topped up with paracetamol, slipping in and out of sleep, in between bouts of sneezing and cups of tea, keeping a wad of tissues handy and intermittently smelling my mother’s white cotton handkerchief dabbed  with eucalyptus oil.

The fever and body ache somehow bring emotions closer to the surface. They make me feel fragile. Bidding farewell to my family has been harder than usual. But I am grateful to have had the chance to hug them as I bid goodbye.

With Saagar that didn’t happen.
No hugs. No kisses. No tears.
No ‘Bye darling’.
No ‘See you later’.
Nothing.

That rude severance, sudden departure, quiet exit has left me utterly and desperately incomplete … as if in suspended animation, hanging in mid-air, like an unfinished sentence…
Is there any way to completion now?
Is there any such thing as a complete story, a complete life?

Each journey is individual and unique. People come and go as and when they please. I suppose it is wonderful that they choose to walk with me for as long as they do. Sometimes we only realise how much we love someone after they leave us. Too late! If only we could show our love and appreciation for our dear ones while they are still here with us…

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