Today is Day 0

Today I was told by my 20 years old son in a hand written message that he ‘could not take this anymore’.

‘This’ being his recently diagnosed depression.

Half an hour later the Transport Police was at my door informing me that indeed, a young man fitting his description had been found on the rail tracks at our local train station. They handed me the keys and wallet in his pocket and described his clothes.

This happened 6 and a half hours ago.

I had been thinking of starting a blog for a long time but today seemed to be the perfect day to do it as my dearest friend who knows how to do these things is staying over tonight and could help me do this. On my own I am useless. As my son would say with a snigger – it is funny to watch ‘old people’ working on a computer.

Seeing it is Day 0 today, I am numb and exhausted. Yet, I am grateful for the gift that he was and always will be.

Kids are gifts, to be loved and cherished every moment of everyday!

7 thoughts on “Today is Day 0

  1. Dear Sangeeta,

    I don’t know what to write. Just wanted to read backward to Day O. I have skipped several, but I will read them. I know GRIEF. From different angles. I send you empathy, thanks for sharing and I think this therapeutic for you as well, Marie

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  2. Sangeeta i met you last week and we spoke about greenpeace. Im very greatful you gave me a link to this blog.
    Its beautifully written.
    Often when environmentalist talk about todays society they frequently say its consumerism thats the problem, and im likely to agree, Consumerism is about filling a gap.
    The question is ‘What makes us feel ‘full’ inside?
    Things, food, oblivion..? Of course this is only temporary.
    In truth its being Great Full for the people who weve had or used to have in our lives That make the greatest impact .
    And recognising this knowledge we will never feel empty again, since spirit is eternal.
    Im great Full for finding your inspiring blog.
    I suffered with bouts of depression in my own life and am just starting to learn about how i impacted on those closest to me, ive been so unaware for a very long time…
    Keep up the great work !
    Lydia 🙂

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    • Dear Lydia,
      It was lovely to meet you. Thank you for visiting the blog. I am indeed very lucky to be Saagar’s mum. Hence the name ‘kidsaregifts’.I feel so blessed! Thanks for sharing your own experience of depression. I wish you luck and hope we will meet again soon.
      Take care. Sending you lots of love,
      S. xxx

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