Day 26

The beauty of the memorial service is still with me.

One of his friends has put together a scrap book in his memory, with all his pictures, lots of lovingly done art work with relevant poems, songs and personal statements from his friends and family. She has presented it to me so that ‘He can always live on every time you look at this book’. One of my friends has put together a beautiful assortment of reggae music for us to help us heal. I believe that my son has inspired people to express their feelings in more than just words. After the service people have been saying that they are inspired to learn to play a musical instrument or to speak with a new person at a gathering or to be a better human being or to live life more fully. May be that was the purpose of his life.

He was very unique and we all could see that in him. But he lost sight of that in his darkest hour. We are all special in our own way. We don’t take enough time to think about that. We can never really know how much we mean to people around us. We can only guess and often underestimate.

One of my friends reminded me how I had always respected his choices and tried not to impose my views on him. If I truly loved him, i would do the same now. May be he did what he did, to alleviate not only his own suffering but also mine. May be he is now free and joyfully charming the angels.

Rest in peace my darling.

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