Day 358

A kind and intelligent friend who has a mental illness said to me this morning, ”I have been severely suicidal three times this year believing that everyone would be better off without me. But meeting you has been a complete game changer for me. Now I think of my Mum every time the thought of killing myself crosses my mind”. I just hugged her with tears in my eyes.

Authentic sharing is powerful. Any number of self-help books and beautiful quotes fade in front of the simplest words spoken from the heart.

In a week from today, one year will have gone by since he passed away. As the anniversary draws closer, I have a strong sense of impending doom. This morning my Mum called me from Delhi, which is very unusual. The first feeling on reading her name as the caller was that of horror. Why is she calling me? What is wrong? What a relief it was to hear her sweet voice asking for a certain friend’s phone number! Phew! Thank heavens!

One year! How have I survived for so long without him? I didn’t think that was possible. In fact it is not possible. He has been with me every minute of everyday and will be with me forever more. He is my strength and inspiration. Years will come and go, I will always love him and he, me. xxx

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