Back in Delhi for a few days. Any excuse.

The warmth in the air is welcoming but wrong for this time of year. I remember the city being submerged in a cold mist in early December, famously disrupting flights and traffic. In the absence of central heating, the houses used to feel the same as being out in the freezing open. Getting into bed was like plunging into icy waters. Getting out was the same. Electric room heaters had most of the family huddled around it in the evenings. Afternoons were spent on the terrace extracting some warmth out of a feeble sun, sitting around a news-paper, eating roasted peanuts and sweets made from sesame seeds and jaggery. Sweet masala tea was an essential part of every other hour and caloric intake, never a consideration. The multiple layers of clothing worn round the clock made everyone look uniformly shapeless.

Today most people are in jeans and t-shirts. Even a jumper is too much. The sun shines brightly and a blanket of smog smothers the city. The ‘normal’ Air Quality Index lies in the ‘hazardous’ range and yet life goes on as ‘normal’.

A lovely young lady meets me on the staircase and she is one of Saagar’s closest childhood friends. She has finished her graduation and has been in a job she loves for the last 6 months. We give each other a big hug. I silently give her my blessings even though my heart disintegrates yet again.

The Giant’s Causeway is said to have formed 60 million years ago as a result of a unique way in which lava cooled down. It formed forty thousand basalt columns each one with 5 to 7 sides, fitting perfectly into each other. The name comes from a local legend. Finn McCool was a giant who wanted to walk across from Ireland to Scotland through the sea without getting his feet wet. So, he built the causeway. Some geological features at the location are given names like ‘giant’s camel’ and ‘giant’s boot’ to add to the story.

It is one of the most magnificent sites at the edge of the North Atlantic Sea. 3 sets of columns – little, medium and tall are very obviously located and many more lie buried in the sea. The natural geometry is cleverly engineered. Away from the sea behind the ‘giant’s gate’ is a black and red gigantic rock. It is a hidden beauty. I have visited this place a few times before but today was the first time I fully appreciated this picturesque structure. The weather was cold but the light was perfect. Thankfully, there was no rain or fog or crazy wind. Si and I walked up a steep narrow path up to a high point facing the sea and had our ‘Titanic” moment!

Whenever we had visitors from abroad when we stayed in Belfast, a trip to the Giant’s Causeway was an essential part of their Norn-Irish experience along with a seafood lunch at Port Rush and a trip to Bushmills.

10 years ago I was here with Saagar. Today Si was with me.

“You let time pass – that’s the cure. Change can be difficult to accept. You survive the days. You put one foot in front of the other and get on with it. You float through the weeks and months wondering if your life will ever go back to what it used to be.

And then, one day you find yourself alone on a bench in the sun and you close your eyes and lean back and you realise that you’re okay. You realise how far you have come. You realise you’ve just fallen onto a different path leading you to your true destination.         You realise, ‘I can do this’. Behind every smile there is an untold story. Sometimes it’s a mask to hide pain and suffering. Sometimes it’s a true reflection of happiness.”- LL.