I don’t know what to do.
A question that sometimes drives me hazy.
Am I or all the others crazy?
I think I know myself. Rather, knew myself.
But when I heard someone speak these words on TV,
I thought they were just for me –
Barking, barking mad.
Bonkers, crackers, crackpot.
Delirious, demented, deranged.
Destructed, destroyed, doolally.
Frantic, cuckoo, non compos mentis.
You’ve lost your marbles.
You’re not right in the head.
Not a full shilling. Na.
You are off your rocker.
Uncertain of mind.
Unhinged, unstable, unglued.
Flipped out, moonstruck, insane.
This is me. For sure.
This is my precious little secret.
I deceive everyone everyday.
My son must have thought the same.
I feel so close to him when I feel this way.
I will find a way through my insanity.
Find the order in my chaos.
Otherwise how will I ever find him?